Perspective

So, I have been writing this blog for almost 10 months now. That's a pretty big deal. It has been incredibly helpful for me to have a little accountability to learn and to pay attention.

This week I've been 'conflicted' with various aspects of my life and at church today, and since then, I've had a lot on my mind about perspective.

Sacrament focused on seeing God's hand in your life, and to be honest, where I liked the two adult speakers, I felt that the 12 year old speaking had a message more for me. He talked about seeing God in the little things like the weather and in nature. We've been given a beautiful place to test us, and to help shape us to be more like God.

In Sunday School we talked about the First Vision, how God was able to get everything set up - and Relief Society we focused in on the miracles and importance of baptism. It was kind of a hard day for me. I've not been feeling very well, for about a month, and hearing about all these great stories of miracles of God's involvement, I was put down a little because I feel a little in the dark with my life and everything I believe.

Well, I came away with wanting to pay more attention to what God would have me learn. If I am where I am supposed to be, what should I be paying attention to? What areas in my life need to be improved, and how can I find joy when I feel alone, bored, and unmotivated.

Friday night I had decided to not let Saturday go away without doing a project. So, I forced myself to find something creative I could do. And, so I made a little chalk board for my friend's upcoming wedding. In the spirit of full disclosure, I am feeling left out of her wedding even though she tells me I get to be involved and she wants me to be a part of it. So, I am working on loving her anyway, and not freaking out that it isn't how I think it should be. In fact, I have to go finish it up right now.

I am more motivated to let go of the anxiety and trust God with my life. I am willing to at least look for alternatives to my idea of how my life should be going. And this is because of the Spirit I felt at church today.